


Breathe

by AnxiousCheesecake, Lyrikin



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Allura - Freeform, Angst, Anxiety, F/M, Gen, Lance is just joke flirting, NO DEATH, One sided Allurance, Voltron, lance - Freeform, rip allura, self doubt, some self harm, vent fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-16
Updated: 2017-10-16
Packaged: 2019-01-18 01:51:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 626
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12378402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnxiousCheesecake/pseuds/AnxiousCheesecake, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lyrikin/pseuds/Lyrikin
Summary: Soon enough those words that used to make her so happy became hands that wrapped around her neck.Beautiful.Smart.Amazing.And with each word, those hands tightened.





	Breathe

She had been okay. No care in the world about how she looked, sounded or what people thought of her. She was happy, laughing and smiling with everyone. It was an ideal life.

 

But something changed.

 

Maybe it was because she grew older and realized that maybe she wasn’t as special as everyone said she was. That maybe she wasn’t this brilliant child that made her parents proud. That maybe… she was a disappointment.

 

Soon enough those words that used to make her so happy became hands that wrapped around her neck.

 

_Beautiful._

 

_Smart._

 

_Amazing._

 

And with each word, those hands tightened.

 

Soon she dreaded waking up. Not ready for what the day would bring and how it would end. She wasn’t ready for the stupid mistakes she’ll make that will hurt others. She wasn’t ready to be a failure again and again and again. _And again._

 

She started eating less, drinking less water and sleeping late. She started to dig a hole where hopefully no one could reach her. Besides she couldn’t bother them with such simple things.

 

She needed to look pretty. She needed to be smart. She needed to not be a fuck up. She needed to meet those standards. But they were too far. She jumped and her fingers barely grazed the next step of the ladder. She knew that her standards for herself were too high but it was the only thing that kept her going. It was the only thing that kept her alive.

 

Allura may be the strong Princess of Altea on the outside.

 

But in the inside, she just couldn’t breathe.

 

Eating and drinking became a chore. Drinking a glass of water every other day. Eating a few bites here and there. Food wasn’t something she needed anymore. Her body never told her she was hungry or thirsty, so Allura went with it.

 

And… it felt good. The pain of hunger reminding her that she deserved it. It was something that distracted her from the war that was happening right in front of her.

 

Allura would sometimes think that she was just being terrible and doing this for attention. She would try to eat more but even swallowing just a few bites would hurt. But that was fine. No one would notice. She did make sure that she ate enough to still fight in the war so it wouldn’t bother the others.

 

Life went on and the war still hadn’t ended. Her trust in the Paladins had increased significantly since they first met. Her trust in one was… beyond the others.

 

She always acted annoyed to his flirting but whenever he did she felt her heart jump to her throat. She couldn’t pinpoint what made her… like him so much.

 

It could have been his jokes. Or his sweet nature. Or his stupid flirting that always got to her.

 

But Allura knew he didn’t mean it. That it was just some fun and games and she was getting dragged along.

 

Yet… Allura couldn’t stay away. He was a magnet that drew her back in every time she tried to run. It was a strange feeling, one she had never experienced. It made her feel giddy yet it hurt. It hurt way more than the feeling of hunger. But she just couldn’t stay away.

 

Now here she was. Crying. Because she was useless. Because everything was just too much. The hunger was too much. Her broken heart was too much. Life was too much. The waves kept on pulling her back in everytime she broke the surface. The crashing waves crushed her hopes that everything will be okay. But it won’t. And it never will.

 

So she closed her eyes, letting the waves pull her in.

 

And stopped breathing.

  


**Author's Note:**

> Writer's Tumblr: [Hippotron](https://hippotron.tumblr.com/)
> 
> Artist's Tumblr: [Lyrikin](http://lyrikin.tumblr.com/)
> 
> Please reblog art from[ here](http://lyrikin.tumblr.com/post/166450353173/breathe-an-allura-centric-oneshot-by-my)


End file.
